Proper Grammar and Spelling are Sexy……….A friend of mine, recently, was talking about the things she liked about her boyfriend. “He’s always there for me and he’s really good at his job,” she began, listing off a few more of his good qualities before finishing: “and he knows the difference between your and you’re with an apostrophe.” We both laughed at this because it seems so trivial, and yet can be so important. Especially in today’s technologically advanced dating culture, your spelling and grammar are on display of equal importance to your ability to take a flattering photo of yourself. If you don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re,” the women you date will know – whether they find out through text message, email, or your profile on a dating site. And they will judge.
“Your sexy,” read the message another friend received one day on OKCupid, causing her to groan. The guy who’d sent it appeared otherwise handsome and eligible – nice face, nice body, secure job, liked funny TV shows, had a few interesting hobbies, etc. The “your sexy” thing, however, caused my friend to discount him entirely. “I just can’t,” she said. “Every time he said that word I’d know, deep down, that he couldn’t spell it.”
While this may seem superficial, proper use of spelling and grammar in early communications with a prospective date shows that he cares enough to get it right. Enough spelling and grammar mistakes, on the other hand, make a man seem lazy. If English is his first language, he should have been paying enough attention in grade school to write a literate message to a prospective date as an adult and if he can’t do that, it makes a woman wonder what else he can’t be bothered to learn correctly the first time. If English isn’t his first language, he gets a pass—there’s nothing lazy about learning more than one language at any proficiency.
Native English speakers, if you are trying to get a woman’s attention via your written word, there is some value in using correct spelling and grammar. While not everyone is as brutal as my friends and I about this sort of thing, at the very least it can’t hurt to show a prospective date that you are an able communicator who cares enough to use an apostrophe correctly.