Dear Single Mothers,
You are superheroes! You don’t need a cape but your superpowers go above and beyond the call of duty. Sleepless nights, followed by a full day of work, topped off with caring for your sweet children. I see you! You are so far from alone. In 2019, statistics show that over 14-million families were led by a single female. That’s 14-million incredible women!
The struggles are real; no doubt about that. Especially right now with so many facing unemployment due to the virus. I may not be able to fill your bank account but I can fill your heart and mind with some sweet truths during these sad times. You rock, don’t be modest, admit it, and own it because you deserve it. My father passed away while I was in the womb and my mother was left to carry me and my four older siblings. I saw the struggle she faced.
We had a decent support system of friends and family. But, not everyone has that and it’s not fair. You don’t have to stop there. Social media is full of numerous groups of single mothers just like you and they help each other when times are rough. They too, understand how difficult it can be to put on that happy face even when you might want to rip your hair out or just lay in bed and cry. They also want to share the good things too, those first steps and words, good grades in their classes, and peaceful nights full of warmth and a sense of security.
Our world has been a little topsy-turvy since the Coronavirus. Playdates became something to fear, social distancing became a daily part of life, and face coverings seem to be turning into some sort of fashion. More students are participating in virtual learning, and the number of stay-at-home parents has been on the rise for some time now. Juggling work, kids, their schooling, and childcare arrangements have changed. Daily life has become more difficult as a result.
According to the United States Census Bureau, a chart from July 2020, shows that 32.1 percent of women between the ages of 24 – 44 unemployed due to Covid-19 child care related issues. 25.3 percent of women between 18 – 64 are unemployed for the same reasons. 9.9 percent of men ages 18 – 64 and 12.1 percent between 25 – 44 are unemployed for lack of child care due to the virus. This is rough either way you look at it! It is sad and depressing but let me see if I can bring any hope to your situation. Don’t stop reading now!
Online jobs are brimming with opportunity. It’s going to be another adjustment if it’s new to you but it’s one worth trying. If your kids are learning virtually, you can be working the same way. It can be annoying at times, but it is also a way to generate some income where needed. Who knows, maybe once the world opens back up a little more you just might love your new set up. Just google online jobs that you could do and have an interest in, you might be amazed at what you find that could change your life!
Let the kiddos have small playdates while you enjoy the company of other adults. Use precautions of course, and follow any guidelines and practices that will keep everyone safe. Before winter settles in, get out there in the fresh air with your kids as often as you can. Depending on your location winters can bring about a lot of snow and cold which tends to keep some people indoors even more.
Go out and take a walk, breathe in the incredible air, and straighten that crown. If you already have everything under control, and life is blessed for you, that’s what’s up! Maybe you could help some other ladies out by fixing their crown and passing on that beautiful and bountiful goodness. Bless someone else; sharing the wealth keeps it flowing all around.
I remember when my momma went from single status to the dating game. It wasn’t easy for any of us. It was almost uncomfortable, in a way. Not every situation is the same, so circumstances will vary as will the outcomes. If you’re single and trying to slide into a new relationship then good for you!! Just know there will be challenges; why wouldn’t there be, right? You got this though! Here’s a little advice, it may or may not work for you but if you have some you can share drop them in the comments.
- Take it slow. Not only for yourself but for everyone involved. Your dating life affects everyone, especially your kids.
- Don’t be afraid to introduce your new “friend” to your kids. Let them warm up to this person to get their real feelings because kids are full of raw emotion and if in their mind, you’ve moved on, it kind of hurts them.
- Consider your kids’ opinions in making moves or steps. But remember, they can’t control it all because… they’re kids and full of raw emotion. The final decision is still yours to make.
- Go have fun! Trust your gut and don’t be afraid to feel again, it reminds us that we’re alive.
Reach out to those who care if you need to. If you don’t have that someone to reach out to, you’ll find them, they’re out there and they’re probably waiting for someone like you too.